“Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us.” Hebrews 12:1

William Barclay said that “Endurance is not just the ability to bear a hard thing, but to turn it into glory.”

That continues to be one of my most fervent prayers….that our family and Phoebe’s life would bring glory and honor to the name of Christ. Not simply surviving this but turning the situation into glory.

It is so hard in this environment not to get tunnel vision and get swept up in fear and anger. I believe and can feel now more than ever the difference between peace and happiness. Being happy changes with every report from the doctors or every change in Phoebe’s visible condition. Good report, bad report, good report bad report—–>>>happy, sad, happy, sad, happy….

The grace and peace of the living God comes no matter the circumstance. I have always known this to be true, have preached about it, counseled others in it. But it is more real now than I could ever have imagined before.

So, if you want to know how I am doing…my flesh is sad and worried, but my spirit is full of joy, peace and grace. Life will never be the same, no matter what happens with Phoebe. We are all forever changed. Life has a new soberness and intensity that I hope to never loose.  I feel like I am living in God’s reality in a way that I have never understood before.